ixnay-on-the-oddk:

lunatrip:

lunatrip:

sicam:

sicam:

what do you call a woman with an opinion

wrong

What do you call a guy that makes sexist jokes

Single

avatarhilliams:

holmes-sweet-holmes:

metallikato:

generallegendary:

metallikato:

jewelstaites:

how to give a good handjob

• bop it
• pull it
• twist it

• harder
• better
• faster
• stronger 

You pull your left hand in
You pull your left hand out
You pull your left hand in
And you shake it all about!

Cha cha real smooth

HEY MACARENA

wobble baby wobble

slenclerman:

reasons to date me:
-i can pick stuff up with my feet sometimes
-ive never killed a man (yet)
-i once got 95% on guitar hero
-you can play with my hair
-im cheaper than a puppy

bubonickitten:

0ptimuspenguin:

ambieheartsturtlep0rn:

capitolresident:

Let’s play a game called ‘Stay up late and hate myself in the morning’

‘on a school night’ edition

with unlockable bonus round ‘finals week’

expansion pack: ‘don’t do anything productive’

its time to get into my pajamas (removes bra) all done

babybehemoth:

Anxiety attacks are the worst because sometimes you have no idea why you’re crying or angry and you just think of everything wrong in your life and you can’t control it all you can do is breath in and out and cry it out

banesboner:

“you cant have depression i saw you smile like five minutes ago stop crying”

iloveyougagaloo:

omg Sharon Needles online store info/title

When We Cuddle,

vennom666:

I hope you dont mind if I,

• wrap my legs around yours
• lay my head above your heart
• run my hands through your hair
• play footsie with you
• put my hand on your tummy
• play with yours hands
• give you fishy kisses
• talk about my day
• sing you a song
• fall asleep in your arms
• sacrifice you to satan 

The last one is what I have issues with. :l